Okay, so I’m feeling “normal” again since my surgery and I’ve got a needy, clingy 13 month old who is preventing me from getting anything done. She’s my last and I try very hard to live in this moment because I know it goes way too fast BUT I’m so overwhelmed with catching up on everything I got behind on during my recovery. I forgot how your life revolves around your infant’s schedule. I feel more like a spy than a mom. When she’s busy playing by herself I sneak around her out of fear that she may see me and want to be picked up. I’ve gone as far as throwing her pacifier or a favorite toy in the room to keep her happy before she gets bored and seeks me out. I give her chocolate or fruit snacks so I can go pee by myself or start dinner. I NEVER would have done that with my first two. Then there’s the waiting game. Waiting for it to be nap or bedtime and waiting for her to poop so I can put her down to sleep. Once she’s asleep I dash around trying to get as much as I can done before she awakens. Wouldn’t it be nice if they could tell us how long they plan to nap? I’m afraid to start a big project because I never know if she is going to sleep one or three hours. I’m also a liar. I tell her things are “hot” so she won’t touch them. Poor things. Their entire childhood is full of little parental white lies. My oldest is still traumatized at eight about Santa and the Easter Bunny. I mean really, it’s kind of freaky to think a fat man in a red suit comes in the house while we are sleeping and a giant bunny hops in and hides eggs. I’ve had moments where I wanted to let her off the hook and just tell her the truth so she can sleep without worries. She is going to be very pissed at me when she finds out the truth. Did I mention how I treat my baby like a dog while I have precious ‘puter time? I feed her crackers or cheetos while she sits at my feet. Want to know how I got through having the kids home from school yesterday? I took them to Target and let each of them pick out a new toy so they would have something to do besides fight or whine that they are bored. So there you have it; confessions of how a slacker mom gets through her day. Please don’t judge me too harshly.

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