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It was no surprise to me that my baby, Marigrace would love to dance. It all started with her swinging on the umbilical cord in the womb. Whenever she heard music she would have a dance party in my belly. She practically did the “running man” on her way out.

My oldest daughter also loves to dance. She lives and breathes it. Much of her free time is spent dancing in our basement. Marigrace has been dancing along since before she could walk. She would sit in her bouncy seat and kick her legs to the beat of the music. Once she was finally up on two feet she was able to perfect her dance moves. The “One Shoulder Shimmy” is our favorite but “The Travolta” and her moonwalk are also pretty impressive for a twenty month old.

Don’t believe me? Here’s video proof to show that I’m not just a bragging mother. Okay, I am bragging but her dance skills are too good to not brag about. I’m thinking she could win the Best Little Dancer in America competition or at least some Stride Rite shoes from the PBN Blog Blast. C’mon people. Indulge me. I promise you won’t be disappointed.

I haven’t. Although I did kiss Jon Bon Jovi when I was a teen. That hardly counts but it is a cool fact about me. One of the few.

I ask because this question came up between me and my BFF on our way to a concert Sunday night. I love my hubby and have no desire to cheat BUT I don’t think I would turn down Brad Pitt or Jude Law if they wanted to throw some lovin’ my way. Just as I couldn’t blame my hubby for getting it on with Catherine Zeta Jones if he got the chance. Come on, I would even sleep with her. Okay, probably not but you get my point. What would you do if a super hot celebrity made the moves on you?

So what does this have to do with the rest of this post? Nothing really. Just sharing an interesting conversation. Kind of makes you go, hmmmmm.

The concert we attended was Montgomery Gentry and Tracy Lawrence. Turns out that my BFF knows Tracy Lawrence. They go back like 11 years so she catches him in concert every chance she gets. I admit that I didn’t know many of his songs prior to the concert. The ones I did know I really like such as Sticks And Stones and Time Marches On. Now since the concert I’ve listened to his music nonstop. I love his new song Til I Was a Daddy Too. It’s a tear jerking goosebumps kind of song.

We had a great time at the concert, drinking frozen margaritas and doing the female bonding thing. We even got hit on. Enough that when a young guy approached us we were arrogantly expecting a corny pick up line. Our egos were deflated when he asked us if we would buy him a beer because he’s underage. We were like “Bye, bye now.” Go home to mommy, little boy.

Here’s a photo of us with Tracy Lawrence.

This isn’t so much as post but a question to my readers. I’m looking into pet insurance for my new puppy, Happy. We joked that Sonny was our million dollar dog although it’s really not funny. He had chronic allergies and had multiple vet visits a year for ear infections, hot spots, and other skin issues. Our biggest expense was the last few months of his life. We spent over $3500 on tests, procedures, medications, euthanasia, and cremation. It would have been nice to get some of that reimbursed. We are the kind of dog parents who will do whatever it takes to diagnose and treat our pets so I think pet insurance is a must for us. I’ve been researching companies and reading reviews and I’m more confused than ever. The fine print isn’t always very clear and I’ve read many horror stories of claims not being paid for various reasons. Of course there are always going to be more bad reviews than good since most people are more likely to write about a bad experience.

I hope those of you with pet insurance can help me make a decision. I want to hear your pet insurance success stories or complaints.

I don’t read the paper or watch the news much anymore because I’ve become increasingly more anxious whenever I read about death, crime, and poverty. I don’t know if it’s because I’m a mom, a nurse or due to awareness of my own mortality as I age. It’s probably a combination of all three.

I bring this up because I happened to catch the news tonight and unfortunately I saw a story that nearly sent me into a panic attack. A seven month old baby died in a hot car today. There was a misunderstanding between the parents. The mother is a pediatrician and was running late for a meeting so she parked her car in front of the hospital. She called her husband who works nearby to move the car for her. The baby was still in the car because she didn’t have time to take her to daycare. There was a misunderstanding between her and her husband who did not realize that the baby was in the car because she was in a rear facing carseat. The baby was in the car for about four hours before found. The thought of that baby overheating to death makes me physically ill. My heart goes out to the parents. I can see how this tragic accident can happen, especially during a hectic morning.

I also heard that a two year old died today in a car in Cincinnati. I beg and plead with all of you with children to check your backseat when you get out of your car. Especially dads who may not drive their children on a regular basis. Keep a visual in the front seat, such as a teddy bear, that your child is in the back. Another idea is to put a cell phone, wallet, or anything that’s absence would be quickly noticed on the back seat. Also, please don’t leave your children in a hot car while you run an errand. Even five minutes is too long for and infant or child. Please mention this to your friends and family. You may save a child.

Look what the stork brought us!

We named him Happy because according to my kids he’s our happy after our sad. Of course he can’t replace our Sonny Boy but he’s certainly a great distraction.

I wasn’t sure if I wanted to get a new puppy so soon after Sonny’s death. It seemed unfair to Sonny. I found our him the day before Sonny’s planned euthanasia. I set out to visit several Golden Retriever puppies. My hubby warned me to not buy the first one I saw. Guess what? I bought the first one. It was love at first sight. How could I not love that ball of fur with those big brown eyes that were saying take me home? He seemed perfect for our family. He’s house broken, pretty calm, and used to kids. When the owners told me that their kids dress him up in baby clothes and push him across the hardwood floors I knew he’d fit right in at our house. I paid for him but decided it was best to not bring him home until after Sonny was gone. Sonny deserved our full attention in his last few days. The plan was for the new puppy to be brought to us the morning after Sonny’s passing.

I felt terribly guilty about getting the new puppy. The night that Sonny passed and when I sat by the pool in the same spot that I had sat with Sonny earlier in the day I felt that I had made a terrible mistake. How could we get a new puppy? This is Sonny’s house, Sonny’s pool, Sonny’s yard, Sonny’s woods, Sonny’s family. Sonny lived here before us. He was bred here. When we came to look at the house we saw Sonny and ended up buying both.

If it weren’t for the kids I would have probably decided to not get the puppy. They needed something to be excited about. Something else to focus on. They have been great about taking care of Happy. Making sure he is fed, playing with him, and taking him out to go potty. I’m really proud of how responsible they are being. Granted they will probably not be so responsible once the novelty of the puppy wears off but I can hope!

What I’ve realized is that Sonny was my dog. Happy is theirs. I know in time I will love him just as much as Sonny. I remember being pregnant with my second baby and thinking I wouldn’t be able to love another baby as much as my first. Well I did and I know before long Happy will be as much a part of our family as Sonny was. Right now it just feels weird.

Happy does make me happy. I forgot how much like a baby puppies are. I feel like I have two toddlers in the house. He gets into as much stuff as Marigrace does. He’s not too hyper though and will let me rock him like a baby until he falls asleep. The nice thing is that if I need him out of my hair I can crate him. Wish I could do that with my kids. Oh wait, I have.

It’s all good!

*** Please vote for my friend Vickie in the Battle Of The Youtube Mom Stars! Go here and leave in the comments that your vote is for vjm1234 in battle 8! ***

On August 19, 1997 we brought Sonny home to live with us and ten years later to the day we sent Sonny to live in God’s home.

We had him euthanized a little after 7pm this past Sunday. It was such a gift to him and to me that he went so peacefully.

Sunday was a very hard day. If you’ve been following along you know that Sonny had a nasal tumor that was slowly claiming his life. On Saturday I made the very difficult decision to end his suffering. Ironically the date of his passing was the ten year anniversary of when he became our dog. I believe it was a divine intervention of the universe sending me a sign that I had chosen the right time.

We spent our last day with him by treating him to all the things he loved. He ate like a king and received lots of petting which was his favorite thing of all.

At one point I got a chance to spend some time alone with him. I took him out to the pool for his last swim but rather than swim he sat in the water on the step. I think he was afraid to go out by himself. He did later swim once the rest of the family joined us.

We sat alone together for quite awhile. I told him how much we loved him and thanked him for his loyalty. Then we sat quietly, listening to the birds, watching the squirrels, and taking in the beauty of the trees and flowers surrounding us. It made me sad that he no longer wanted to chase the squirrels or run in the grass. When did he get so old? It happened so gradually that I hadn’t noticed. At that moment I realized how old and sick he really was. Now looking back at photos it’s more than obvious.

His last supper was a pork chop, corn, and lots and lots of treats. His belly was so full and he was so worn out from swimming that he was falling asleep with his head up.

Our plan was for the kids to go out to dinner with a neighbor. As I was getting them ready to go, Isabelle who has sensory issues, began complaining that none of her clothes felt right and that she felt like she couldn’t breathe. She no longer wanted to go with my neighbor which prompted Madeline to whine about staying home. My hubby decided that rather than he stay home for the euthanasia he would take the kids out for ice cream. I think he was more than happy to have an “out”. I was relieved too because I was upset enough and I don’t think I could have handled seeing him lose it.

My best friend Rhonda who is a vet and another vet friend Aileen called to let us know that they would be at the house at 7 pm. That gave us 25 minutes to finish our good-byes. I set up the camera with the timer so we could get a family photo with Sonny. I was a nervous wreck so it was no surprise that I cut off some heads.

My hubby and the kids took turns privately saying good bye to Sonny. Isabelle was last. When I came in to see what was taking her so long I found her hysterically crying. This is the first time she had cried or voiced any sadness about Sonny. She was finally understanding the finality of the fact that he would no longer be here when she got home. I was able to calm her down enough to get her in the car but she bolted back in to say good bye one more time. It broke my heart in a million little pieces.

My hubby and the kids left just as Rhonda and Aileen arrived. Sonny was so excited to see Rhonda that he had a pretty bad coughing and wheezing spell. It was really hard to see him jump up to greet her with his tail wagging knowing what we were about to do.

The rest is a blur of tears so I will save you from all the details. It was such a gift from Rhonda and Aileen that he was put to sleep at home. He was not at all stressed. All he knew was that two of his favorite people were petting and kissing him as he went to sleep. At first it was difficult to see him so lifeless but then the realization that he was no longer suffering sunk in. I hadn’t seen him look so peaceful in a long time. In the last few months his sleeping was plagued with snoring and a slow trickle of blood from his nose.

I hugged and kissed him one last time then went down to the pool to sit where I sat with Sonny a few hours earlier and cried like a baby.

The house feels weird. I keep looking for him to be in all his usual places. I have lost pets before but none of them have hurt like this. There was something special about Sonny. He was such a gift to us and I’m grateful that we gave him the gift of easing him out of this world in such a loving way.

We will never forget you, Sonny Boy. You will always have a special place in our hearts.

This is a difficult post to write. I’ve been wrestling with the idea of putting Sonny to sleep for weeks now. I had prayed that he would go on his own so I wouldn’t have to be the one to decide but that’s not going to happen without some suffering. It’s time. It’s been time. But every time he wagged his tail, took a dip in the pool, or got excited for a treat I got a false sense that he wasn’t ready to go. I would overlook that he sleeps all day unless we engage him, he hasn’t barked in months, and that his snoring has gotten worse from the tumor growing. He is most likely suffering much more than he’s letting on. His coughing and wheezing has worsened over the weekend. Our plan was to euthanize him on Wednesday but I have finally reached the point where watching him deteriorate is more painful than letting him go. So I put on my big girl panties and called my best friend who is a veterinarian. She and another vet friend will come out to the house tonight and help us ease Sonny out of this world and into the next. No pain, no suffering, just going to sleep with his family and friends next to him.

God this is hard.

Here’s the weird thing. When I told my hubby that we probably should do it today he mentioned that ten years ago today was when we brought Sonny home.

“Are you sure?” I asked.

“You have it written right here in the photo album,” he tells me as he opens the photo album that I had gotten out earlier. I’ve been going through old albums looking for photos of Sonny to scan for a slideshow I’m working on.

Sure enough there it was scribbled in my crappy handwriting.

I bawled like a baby. Is this a coincidence or a divine intervention from the universe? I’m ending his life ten years to the day that I brought him home to be mine. I’m taking it as a sign because that’s how I think and believe. I’m taking comfort that this is the right day. My BFF had assured me that I would know when the time was right. At the time I thought she was full of shit. How would I know when the right time to end his life would be when I’m trying to avoid it? Thank God for those divine interventions.

He will certainly be missed. To know Sonny is to love Sonny. No matter who you were he was always happy to see you. I often joked that Sonny would welcome a burglar into our home.

He was my first baby but happily accepted the four babies that followed. He was never jealous or unkind. They are his pack. He would cry like a kid at the window if they went outside without him or when he was in the car at the time I dropped them off at school. He may welcome a burglar but he would defend his pack if he felt they were in danger. Once he took on a mean dog that got between him and his pack.

He was a friend to all our neighbors. If someone was taking a walk while he was out he would join them and then come back once they were safely home. When we let him free to run the neighborhood he would visit his dog friends and favorite neighbors for a treat. Even our mailman loves Sonny! He has touched so many people and their care and concern for him is heart warming.

We are going to miss you, buddy. You are worth every ounce of pain I’m feeling and every tear I’m shedding.

My family is letting me out of the house tomorrow night! They are unchaining me from my torture chamber, pushing me out the door and telling me to not let the door hit me in the ass as they send me out for some me time. They realize that their torturing me with their fighting, nagging, whining, and constant demands has made me very crabby. And boy do I need it! My kids are exhausting me and school does not start for another couple of weeks. There’s too much togetherness going on and we all need a little breathing space.

Tomorrow night I get to go out and not be a mom or a caretaker of a dying dog and have some fun. I’m meeting a few St. Louis bloggers for dinner and I would like to extend the invitation to any other bloggers who are in the area that would like to go. What would make my night extra special is if the lovely bitches that I bonded with at BlogHer would join us. My guest room is all ready for you. It could be a slumber party. We could get drunk and immature then skinny dip in the pool. Pretty please, won’t you come? I’m asking nicely.

Shauna has reminded me that I forgot to post my BlogHer business card as promised. Here it is. I think only those who read my blog understand the items on my “receipt”.

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Remember the Friends episode where Ross gets a spray tan? He had a little trouble with turning around in time for his back to get sprayed and ended up with a comedy of errors. He was instructed to count to five and then turn around. Rather than counting 1…2…3…4…5, he counted one Mississippi, two Mississippi… just watch the clips. It’s hysterical. I’ve posted the five minute (first) and two minute versions (second).

I recently had my first Mystic Tan and fortunately it turned out way better for me than for Ross. I made a joke about this episode to the girl that gave me instructions on how to use the spray tan booth. She didn’t find it funny. She was probably still in diapers when Friends was popular. She gave me statistics about how they had someone get sprayed a gazillion times and they did not end up ridiculously orange. I still wasn’t completely convinced that it’s impossible to end up as orange as an Oompa Loompa.

I followed all the instructions to a T. I lubed my body with lotion and my hands and feet with the barrier cream. I spent ten minutes getting my body ready for something that would last forty seconds. Kind of like foreplay.

I noticed on the instructional signs that I should use nose plugs but they were nowhere to be found in the room. I thought no big deal. Who is going to be looking in my nose anyway? My kids would actually get a kick out of mommy having orange boogers. I stepped into the booth, got into position and pushed the button. The cold spray was shocking at first. What I didn’t expect was my inability to hold my breath when the spray hit my face. I felt like a fish out of water gasping for air. Oh great! Now I’ve got tan lungs. By the third time it sprayed my face I feared that I was going to hyperventilate. Fortunately it was time to turn around. I was able to calm myself down from a near panic attack as my back was sprayed. I got out quickly before I inhaled anymore fumes.

I rubbed myself dry with the towel just as I was instructed and was off on my merrily little way to wait for my tan to appear. It did a few hours later and I was quite pleased. No streaks and it was the perfect amount of color. I smelled a little funny the first two days but I think it was more noticeable to me than anyone else. I would love to do it again since it’s much easier and more uniform than when I spray myself. My fear is that breathing that crap cannot be good. The whole reason I’m opting for spray tanning is because UV rays are known to cause cancer. Spray tanning won’t cause skin cancer but what about lung cancer?

I want to know your experiences with the Mystic Tan. Did you have trouble holding your breath? Would the nose plugs have helped? Is breathing the spray dangerous?

If I do give it another try I think I’m going to cover my face and use a facial tanning cream. I don’t want to die for tan skin. It’s bad enough I have to worry about what’s in my shampoo and beauty products.

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